Blonde Diet

A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet. "I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least 5 pounds."

When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?"

The blonde nodded, "I'll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day."

"From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor.

"No, from skipping."

Humorous Tidbits

Patient: It isn't possible that I'm as overweight as you say I am.Nurse: Maybe you would prefer to look at it in a different way. According to this chart, you're about 10 inches too short.


"A new study claims that mouth-to-mouth resuscitation is not necessary during CPR and it's better to skip right to chest compression. However, the study says that you're still required to snuggle for a half hour afterwards."~Conan O'Brien


Two kids were trying to figure out what game to play. One suggested, "Let's play doctor." "Good idea." said the other. "You operate, and I'll sue."



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